Butler vs Butler! BEGIN!
by The Rayne Alchemist
Summary: Sebastian and Frankenstein face off to see who is 'The Ultimate Butler' Drabble Competitions and Domestic One shots. Some may be related. Some might not be. Review if you have any requests. Sporadic updates.
1. Introductions

**I know I know. You're probably going "But Rayne! Don't you have exams right now? Isn't that why Black Witch is on Hiatus?"  
**

**Yes. Yes I do. But this bunny has been hopping around my head for the past week and i felt the need to put it down DRABBLE form. **

**I don't know where they are. Most likely in Frankenstein's lab. Remember the table Tao and the others set up once when they were waiting on Frankenstein to give them a check up? Yeah, that's back.  
**

* * *

**Introductions**

Eyes flashed. Tempers flared.

This wasn't a game. Any fool could see that. Their honour. Their pride. Their _dignity _stood to be affected by the outcome of this match.

Sebastian narrowed his eyes, fingers flexing ever so slightly. Frankenstein straightened his back, arms loose at his side ready for the upcoming battle.

"Ready!" Tao declared cheerily, waving a white handkerchief. "Start!"

Sebastian reaction time was just a millisecond faster than Frankenstein's and he instantly laid out his first attack.

"My lord, Ciel Phantomhive, was named Earl of Phantomhive at the age of 10!" he declared.

"My Master, Cadis Etrama di Raizel, has been the Noblesse ever since his birth," Frankenstein countered.

"The young master serves as the Queen's watchdog and discreetly manages the affairs of the underworld all the while running his company, the most successful toy company in England, Funtom!" Sebastian said.

"Master has ruled as Noblesse for over 1000 years and can only be matched in power by the Lord of Nobles," Frankenstein declared.

"Young master is a genius at games," Sebastian said smugly. "There is no game that he will lose."

"Master is so powerful he does not need to play games," Frankenstein replied cooly.

"At least young master can operate a phone," Sebastian sneered.

"Master does not need to wear heels," Frankenstein spat.

Eyebrows twitched. It was so on.

"They're really getting into this, aren't they?" Tao asked, watching the two butlers go at it.

"Honestly, you'd think they'd be off curing cancer or something" Alyssa sighed, pouring tea out for Ciel. "But instead they're swinging their egos around trying to see whose is bigger." She shook her head in an unimpressed fashion and refilled Rai's cup as well.

Ciel sweat dropped at Sebastian's antics while Rai calmly sipped his tea.

* * *

**I should be studying. I really should be studying. I had a few exams already but this damn drabble refuses to die... **

**And for those of you who don't know who Alyssa is, she's my OC from my other story "Black Witch". Check my profile and check the story out to get to know her better. **

_**WHAT UP SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION!**_

******Review if you have any requests because I just have a feeling that this isn't a one time thing...**

******And yes, i know this should be in the cross overs section but noblesse cross overs don't get a lot of traffic y'know? *sigh***


	2. Iron Chefs

**Funnily enough, fadedvoice, when you reviewed I was halfway through this one and another one where they encounter Grell so I decided to put this one up first. **

**Setting: Franken's House in the dining room. Regis' location, unknown. The rest of RK is present though as is Alyssa, Ciel and Raizel. **

* * *

"Is this really necessary?" Ciel asked, rubbing his temples.

"Of course!" Sebastian and Frankenstein said, but not without exchanging a fierce glare.

Ciel made a face of disbelief, a sentiment he no doubt shared with his silent companion, at the table before them. Spread in all their glory, two samples of almost every dish the two butlers could think of.

Savoury foods ranging from curries to ramen, pastries stacked on elegant displays and as many mouthwatering sweets that the two could handle -and even more!

"This _does_ seem a tad ridiculous," Alyssa said, chuckling nervously at the overdone spread.

"Everything looks so go~od!" Tao muttered, drooling. Frankenstein shot the modified human a glare which sent him scurrying behind Takeo for refuge.

"Now young master, if you could, please try every dish on the table and say, in total honesty *coughminecough* which tastes better," Sebastian said, smiling sweetly.

Ciel smacked the heel of his hand against his forehead before standing up. "Absolutely not! You three," and he pointed to M-21, Tao and Takeo (who admittedly looked very surprised at being acknowledged by the earl) "Eat as you desire just to shut those two up!" he snapped. With one last scoff he glared at the two butlers and left the room.

"Well, Ciel said it's okay so~" Tao said, rubbing his hands together eagerly.

Frankenstein's brow twitched. "Please refrain from sampling any dishes until Master has-"

"Raizel-nim left the room just a little while before Ciel-nim," Seira said quietly, interrupting Frankenstein's speech.

"Then it's fine if we dig in, isn't it?" Tao said, already snapping his chopsticks.

Frankenstein slumped in defeat. _Master, have I displeased you?_

Sebastian made a 'tch' sound. _That brat..._

"Do as you wish," Frankenstein said tiredly, waving towards the food.

"Frankenstein..."

"Upa! Everything tastes so good!" Tao exclaimed, chewing on a piece of meat.

"Sebastian..."

M-21 didn't bat en eye, it was Frankenstein they were talking about. As for the other butler, even though he didn't really like the black clad butler, M-21 had to admit he was just as -sometimes even more- capable than Frankenstein.

"Frankenstein..."

"M-21, taste this!" M-21 balked as he suddenly had some curry shoved into his mouth.

"What the-?" He chewed thoughtfully for a moment before... "It's good."

"Sebastian..."

"Miss Alyssa, what are you doing?" Takeo asked, looking at the maid as she placed a tart in her mouth.

"Frankenstein," she muttered quietly before placing its twin in her mouth as well. "Sebastian."

"You can tell them apart?" Tao asked, amazed.

She nodded. "It's slight, but the subtle differences between the two cooking styles makes for two completely different tastes."

"Amazing..."

"So you do have some use after all," Sebastian smirked.

"Watch your tongue," Alyssa said, glaring at the demon.

"So which is better?" Frankenstein asked. The two butlers were tense as they watched Alyssa deliberating.

Her hand drifted over two cakes, one was Sebastian's and the other Frankenstein's. "I think..." and with a deliberate move she swiped her finger through the icing on both cakes. "Neither."

"WHAT?!"

"Both have their good point and their bad attributes," she explained. "I feel it would be wrong to compare two completely different cooks to see who is better when neither seem to be performing on the same grounds. Besides, neither of your masters seem to have reason to complain, that should be good enough for you."

"I see," Sebastian said, thoughtfully.

"How could I have forgotten about the feelings of my Master?" Frankenstein lamented softly.

Alyssa smiled and licked the icing off her fingers. "Good, that being said..." A shiver ran up both servants' spines as the look in her eyes turned deadly. "Clean this mess up. It's appalling to think that two butlers of your calibre would leave such a mess after your competition."

With a 'hmph' she turned away and left the two to tackle the unholy mess left in the kitchen.

* * *

**For this part I keep imagining the scene between Sebastian and Claude were cooking and flinging food at each other and in the end they had both created epic food statues. Something kindof like that happened in the kitchen except there was no food sculptures. Just a mess. **

**I take perverse pleasure in having both of them chastised by Alyssa. **


End file.
